1:15 p.m. - 2009-11-03
way too deep
diaryland has lost it. erasing a post then doubling the next? I don't know what's going on, but I'll never leave you diaryland, never.
I just rocked my baby to sleep. Unless you have raised a toddler you may not realize how rare and precious a moment like that is. I sat there rocking him unwilling to let it end and crying because I love that little one so much that I can only express it with tears. We rocked together and I thanked my Father for my chance to feel this way. To finally understand the bond a parent has with their child.
It makes me stop and think about how my Father feels about me. Does he look down at me and marvel at my accomplishments? Does he brag about me on his blog? Or does he cringe when I knock another little toddler in the face or throw a tantrum when I don't get my way?
Is it my approaching Birthday or being in the midst of encircling trials that is causing all my self evaluation, it's hard to say. There certainly is something inside of me nudging me to be better and another thing on the outside holding and comforting me as I struggle down the path.
